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‘so guys, scared now are we?’ came the voice of their CEO over the local comms.

Me, vo1d, steve and spec are sitting 120km away from the M Corp blob of abaaddons. Apoc’s and another 10-15 assorted BC’s, cruisers and frigs. I am in my vaga and I’m annoyed as I had engaged a harbinger and got him down to 30% structure when the blob warped in and got a bit too close, those apoc’s were packing plenty of heavy neuts. Death to my vagabond. Yet, still I knew I could outsmart these rabid pack of corp drones. There was death in the air, and it would belong to me.

My scanners are going crazy trying to filter out the ships and designate easy targets. I get a return that sticks out from the crowd, it’s their CEO and he is outside in his retriever. Like any other self respecting corp. podding the CEO of an enemy corp is very much top of the pile. The honour and the glory are too great to ignore! I had a target, it was time to dance.

I engaged the MWD and decided to aim It straight through the heart of the blob, it was very risky but I knew it was the only to draw them out. I hit 6km/s and my vagabond tore through space, my computer warned me of ships aquiring lock but I didn’t care!! I glanced the shield of a myrmidon and shot off at a tangent, webifiers desperate to slow me down, but it was too late my momentum was far superior. My console lit up as an enemy heavy neutralizer destabilised my capacitor forcing the ship computer to vent the stored up energy. My overview registered tackle class ships vectoring in on my position, I was in trouble…

‘Fools’ I snigger.

The vagabonds advanced weapon system:
-Can fire at great ranges and do incredible damage.
-Can track frigates that get to cocky
And importantly...
-Can fire with zero capacitor.

I pick off several tacklers trying to engage me and just manage to keep the cruisers out of range. I’m winning, they are doing exactly what I want and I’m pulling them off the station and away from their CEO. I triangulate the position of the retriever and the battleship closest to him. I see a window of opportunity and pounce.

‘Warp drive engaging’

Notify: Equium Duo begins to warp scramble Amathiu M (M Corp)’

Victim: Amathius M
Ship: Retriever

Victim: Amathius M
Ship: POD

‘Duo how the fuck did you do that?’


Cleared for publication by: Ander

So it was with sad news I report that I had lost my very well equipped vagabond, some war targets had bribed the docking crews in the University of Caille, station I had docked at, they had ejected me during a routine diagnostic into waiting war targets. My mostly t2 poly vaga blown to smithereens, quickly followed by my POD. The ‘independent’ investigator found no trace of mishap, even though my logs clearly showed no authorised undock command given. I had to swallow the loss. Ship, implants, the lot!

I was down on cash and could not afford a new poly vaga, so I looked through my ship hanger and found a Hurricane that had one of the engines cut right off when I was retreating from an engagement against an Amarr pilot a few months back, I had neglected to repair it at the time as I had neither the cash nor the incentive. But after recently acquiring max certification in Battlecruiser command via my Command Ship Skill plan, I decided that maybe a few weeks back in the saddle of a BC class ship would go well to re-acquainting me with current piloting techniques.

I liaised with my local station manager and my personnel Senior Engineer and drew up plans for ‘Mr Happy’ the Hurricane Class combat vessel. So a rather large and ‘exotic’ shopping list was drawn up of all the best t2 mods one could acquire in the local trade hub of Alentene. I authorised payment and my engineering team (a very worthwhile investment I might add) got to work and a 24 shift pattern was drawn up to get me into space as soon as possible. I caught up on my lesson plan for a side project I have been quietly progressing whilst my team got down and did the dirty work. 32H later and Mr Happy sped out of station at best speed and got flashed by the local undock speed camera… fortunately one of my maintenance staff had recently painted over my ships identifier tag to mirror that of a crazy cat lady who flew around Pator in a shuttle carrying nothing but cats and cat food. I chuckled when I recalled our encounter when she had signalled for assistance when her small fusion reactor had popped a valve, 15 cats had been instantly vaporised as well as grilling the remaining 75. My second in command had nightmares for weeks…

The ship thrusted into warp and dropped out at alarming speed in a nearby asteroid, I’d forgotten how aggressive this ship was, a local mining ship was busy chewing through the local veldspar. I flagged him for possible future harassment; next belt was a little more promising. 3 members from CZ manufacturing had been harassing a couple of miners and stolen some of their equipment. Threats and abuse were being bounced between the miners and combat pilots and as such the CZ corpies did not notice me slip in and grab it. It became a face off between me in Mr Happy, versus two vexor’s and a thorax. A pretty fair fight in my opinion! The battle begun and the thorax flew straight at me. My guns took a few seconds to spin up but they soon started to eat through the ammo clip that was attached to it, 6 rounds of Hail a second came pouring out of the guns and tore into the thorax, the shields held up reasonably well but as soon as they caught a whiff of something solid the fiery end soon followed. The immensely powerful Hail tore right through the thorax separating the front nacelle from the engine bays, Oxygen poured out of the ship before the fusion reactor erupted in a bright flash. Next up was vexor number one the ship lasted less than 10s before one of my rounds hit a weak spot in the rear superstructure causing its antimatter reserves to react causing the most beautiful green-white flash and cloud. Vexor three was a bit of a tough guy, managing nearly 20s under direct fire from my t2 auto cannons. At the end of the fight their 3 pods just sat there waiting for death, that or they were just too awe-struck by the majestic presence of Mr Happy. One can only imagine.

I returned to a purple faced senior engineer, he had heard about the encounter over the local sub-light frequencies and was furious that I had taken Mr Happy into such an intense field test on her first outing. I congratulated him on a job well done, slipped a tenner in his front shirt pocket and gave him the rest of the day off for putting together such a superb fit. As for the rest of my engineering crew I sent down a large buffet from the third finest restraint in the station for them to munch on and set them to light domestic duties in the hanger. Morale was good and I was very much Mr Happy.

Cleared for publication by: Ander
More spacing in text needed, I added some but please format next time.

Hi, a few days ago I received a chat convo from a player named Zepticon. He was not blessed with the advantage of English as a first language and was having trouble recruiting newer players. But, not only that his corp's bio left a lot to be desired.

‘We are recruiting…
Miner, mission, ratting...
I pay 1.2m ISK if you join.’

Cleared for publication by: Ander
Rest of story moved to extended body.

Continue reading "Corporation Management"

Ok so there I am happily minding my own business as our little incursus gang chalks up another battlecruiser to the kill boards. I then receive a mail, ‘ooh what’s this? ‘I think.
‘Dear Equium
I demand 5m in compensation for the recent theft of one of our jet cans full of ore, and the destruction of one of our miners! If you don not, we will declare war on you!!

Cleared for publication by: Ander
Continue reading "You ransoming me???"