Silly miners, PvP is for pirates!

After spending some time on EvE-Pirate, I found a new and exciting way to kill people! I am referring, of course, to the method of tanking out a hauler, putting a medium turret on it, and ganking miners in high sec by stealing their ore. I'd never stolen ore in my life, or killed someone in high sec. Clearly, I had to change this. Since my usual low-sec hunting grounds were dry, I flew over into Caldari space and bought myself an Iteron III, which had been trained for just such a purpose. After looking at the map for a moment, I set course for Isanamo, a .6 system. Arriving at the system, I started warping to belts to see what I could find. The first belt I warped into held a Scorpion. Apparantly, a MINING Scorpion. I was utterly disgusted, not only because I couldn't kill it, but the whole idea of buying a BS to mine in Empire offended me at a very deep level. I made a mental note to come back in a Dominix and steal his ore.

I warped to a few more belts, and finally found a Velator happily mining away. I see that the pilot is in a starter corp, and since I have no morals or standards, decide to fly over to his can. After a few agonizing minutes of travel, I reach the can and scoop his stuff. I assumed that would be the end of it, but to my surpirse, he locks and opens fire! I smile and return the favor, his noob ship doesn't stand a chance, and is quickly reduced to dust.

As I watch his pod warp off, I see that the belt I'm in has filled up. It's the mining Scorpion, and he's brought friends. A Typhoon, and two cruisers, all members of the same corp. Certainly a scary force to face in a hauler, but I'm not worried! They have no kill rights, I'm perfectly safe. Apparantly they think differently, since a message pops up that I'm being warp jammed. Uh-oh. I must have done something wrong, and am now flagged as a criminal. Losing a hauler to kill a noob ship wasn't exactly what I had in mind when I started this venture, I'm dissapointed. But what's this!? I'm no longer jammed, I can flee! I start to, then I see a pod appear in the belt. Followed by another... CONCORD has come to my rescue! Flying is difficult when laughing this hard, but I managed to quickly grab the remains of the BSs. Sadly, more ships from the same corp warped in to grab the cruiser loot, and CONCORD got my kill mails, but I still got out with about 20 mil in loot, namely some Arbalest cruise and seige launchers, a very nice Heavy Nosferatu, and lots of mining toys. And of course, a story that will be told in corp chat for ages.

Maybe the Dominix would have been overkill.

Cleared for publication by: Ander