Yah Know

Yah know.I have stayed up many nights in my capsule, my egg, pondering the meaning of New Eden.I have stared long upon my ship through out the night. Remembering, Dreaming,Grinning, Watching my Harb scream toward my unsuspecting victims. Seeing my guns blaze off shields, armor, then hull, to SWEET, SWEET, SWEET, Timely demise. My eyes shining I shut down my guns. No one is an innocent here in Eve, one way or another we are all ripping people off. So with that thought I load up their goods in my cargo hold and look at my screen.

“Cargo hold is full” I am told. "Man that was quick all that Veld in 17100 m3 in less than 5 minutes, wow! Those skills paid off in the end".
Did I forget to mention . I am a Miner, and I fly a mighty Hulk. I really do have a Harb and have it fitted for violence; even though it doesnt have t2 stuff fitted. It could still be deadly, just possibly, maybe take someone down. “I like this idea” thoughts of violence often pass my mind while I widdle away my time blasting away Plagi, Kern. Veld, Scord and the occasional rat that crosses my little helpers .

Ahhh my drones. I Especially like, watching from their perspective. The circling, circling, circling, makes me feel like I am the one battleing it out with the rats. Then they explode and I go back to watching the mining lasers methodically pulse away at the roids. After six hours of this I usually dock up the hulk and go for a six pack at my local convenient store to get some of that liquid courage in me.. Have that YARRRRR come out....so my Harb blazing with its guns. can cross the void to its pleading victims. "please sir dont destroy my hulk, I love my hulk", “ HaHaaa I don´t " I type laughingly.

I undock and then wait to redock because the allotted time for squeezing my fat ass out the airlock is more than a 2 second wait. I had forgotten to re fit my ship after strip fitting it. This always seems to happen when I day dream while mining and after a six pack. hmmm…sounds tasty.. be right back.......................Back, another 6 pack. The YAAAARRRR is now Flowing through my veins, after an hour of borrowing money from Corp mates and buying inexpensive t1 gear and realizing my skills just dont seem to be up to it because I am fuckin miner. What a Great choice I made and a waste of 6 months. When I could have been learning the ways of YARRRRING.

So I manage to undock and try find the gate to .4 space Funny thing is, it dosent seem to be in the same place where I left it before the 2nd 6 pack. You know. I wonder at times how much does Concord really know . It’s a Good thing they are just looking for people with contraband and low sec ratings. I am just drunk and as far as I can remember Concord dosent seem to mind . I eventually find the gate and warp through. I un cloak and weave my way to the next jump gate; I chat it up in local with a really good looking Avatar and after leading me on tells me he is a dude. "yah of course I know that, what you think Im drunk pffffft." was my reply, she was good looking though. Wish I could be a good looking Avatar like that..

I jump into .4 space feeling the YAAARRRR coursing , adreniline pumping, my bladder full. I begin immediately do everything Ive read about in forums and EVE Pirate. I jump to a moon open up the scanner and try to remember what I was told about using the damn thin .hmmmm dosent seem to work. Its useless, seems someone may be jamming me. My letters on the scanner are blurry and in the overview as well ; Damn! I want that persons jammer probably t3. Oh well who needs them, its for noobs anyways. So I jump into a belt and see two red blinking victims. HAHAAA, wait , no its rats. Something for my little buddies, I release them and send them to play. I feel like a proud Father watching my sons while they blast away at those bad boys of the block. I do the ever so cool thing of their perspective and watch them circle and circle, circle. The rats popping one after another.

Then out of no where, another blinking red rat appears right on top of me I pull back the view to my ship and desperately try to get my drones back to me. “Bad boys your not moving fast enough". Strangest thing then happens I cant get my ship to warp out and this damn rat is tearing away at my shields then armor and hull and then that ever familiar popping sound. Two seconds later I am an egg being shot at, and then waking up in the hanger being told enjoy your afterlife. I dont remember rats popping eggs. Probably a low sec thing. Ill have to remember that for the next time.
It was not a total loss; even though I forgot to insure my Harb, I got a Imparior, 1 piece of veld and a cool bit of isk for an uninsured ship. Fastest money I ever made in Eve.There just might be a job in that.

Cleared for publication by: Ander
Reformatted a bit for readability.

That was my YARRR experience despite the loss, I loved the adreniline rush and full bladder to go along. Im on my way to Piratetum and one day I will be YAAARRRRING Full Time youll see . Ummmmmmmm By the way, anybody know where I can buy the BP for that really sweet t3 jammer that made things so blurry for me.